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I guess it was because I looked older but I like to think it was my confidence. I lean over the counter, as I've done before but only this time I ask for a bag of Vanilla Sky. He gives me this look. He looks hard. It's this look as if to ask me if I'm sure, if I know what I am doing. Yes, I'm sure, you old stoner hippy. Just sell me the drugs. He picks out a bag then asks for my ID. I had it ready. He pretends to look at it. He's just keeping up appearances. It's the law. This old man, who probably has kids himself, knowingly sold a sixteen-year-old skipping school a half-gram bag of poison for twenty dollars. It's easy to overdose but there's nothing easy about overdosing. There is nothing easy about going to the hospital or being forced not too. It's not easy for your heart to go faster than two hundred beats per minute and to try to scream while choking on imaginary foam. You can only whimper when that pain in your gut is so strong it stole your voice and you're terrified and scared.
